Ahhhh

I’m tired.

What a month it has been. Stag, stagette, wedding, wedding. Ah, what’s a girl to do?

Drink.

Definitely drink.

The girls came down to Victoria for Tamara’s stag on the July 26^th weekend. Oh wait, the girls and one blow up doll came down on the July 26^th weekend. We dressed him up and after playing a round of throw the ring on the penis, we promptly stuffed the penis down the blow up dolls tighties. Well, Rina did. Being pregnant sure makes her eager to caress plastic phallic things.

We started by renting scooters and parading around town on them. Tamara’s sister had glued a veil to one of the helmets which is a good thing otherwise the entire city would have thought we were lunatics. Which is all well and good for them seeing as they all live in Nanaimo or Vancouver but this is my city. I have to live in the aftermath haha. And after Sierra had laid on the horn for about 7/8 of the hour we were on the scooters, I was worried we were going to be run out of town. I had Rina on the back on my bike because she was too scared to ride her own. Sure, she’s too scared to ride by herself. Now I have a pregnant lady on my bike that I’m responsible for, not to mention that she keeps hitting my head with her helmet and squeezing my waste just a little too tight.

After the bike extravaganza we went back to the hotel to pretty ourselves up. That meant pink and red wigs. And wouldn’t you know it, I get the carrot top wig. Oh yes, bright red and curly, curly, curly. So to make up for the travesty that was my wig, I wore my lowest cut shirt. I figured maybe my tits would distract people from the hair. Maybe.

People react strangely to girls on a stagette. Granted, they are usually dressed ridiculously. And are acting drunkenly. We made Tamara conduct a band of Japanese tourists (complete with dollar store instruments), and get behind the bar at Big Bad Johns to make us shots. Then we took her to the bar to dance with a stag party.

To be honest, it could have been a crazier night. Sure, we took over a bus to take us back home because we thought it was a hotel bus. Yes, it turned out to be a chartered stag bus. Whatever. We headed back to the hotel to party more which involved going to bed. We are all far too old.

The next morning they made us go to Smitty’s. I would like to say right now, that I went under protest.

Oh well, anything for my girls.

S.